*Leapt for joy when the metal skewer went clean through an old Tupperware cake box because now I could plant on a couple of tomato plants. I'd been pushing stuff out of the way in my disgraceful garage in order to find some plant pots, found a few, but not nearly enough, so not being one to give up easily I left the garage and headed to the kitchen. Nothing in there but an old tupperware box.
*Stood stock still when a strange tabby cat leapt over my already damaged garden gate. We eyed each other. He was unsure and so was I, so we stared at each other, our eyes fixed, mine on his beautiful head, his on my appalling outfit. He legged it. I said 'cheerio pussy' and lifted my soiled hands to my shorn head and thanked the gardening gods for this sweet moment.
*I found a shoot of a long dead Clematis straining to keep erect, being a romantic fool I looked at it wistfully and thought Mother Natures a determined old girl, but I'll lend her a hand to so I got a tie-back and er....tied it back to the drainpipe. I'll be watching it.
*By this time I'd had two cups of tea.
*Monty growled at a pigeon on the ariel.
*He then got on my lap and I ran my fingers through his long black and grey hair. I wanted to eat him. But that would be cruel. So I let him smell my scent and dig his claws into my thighs. Happy puss.
*I've been thinking about things today and not all domestic.
*Am listening to music as I write this and feel like standing on the chair and whooshing my skirt about.
*Monty is asleep.
*Here's something I wrote for lady gardeners everywhere
Gather your skirt into simple folds
and tuck them between your aching knees
swish a soiled hand around your face
feel the falling dirt land upon your nose
taste it as it lays upon your lips
And do not resist the urge to remove your clothes and run in and out of the bushes
Give in to the desire to dance around the Japanese Maple
feeling the weight of your wonderful unbound breasts
you'll stretch with secateurs
hop with the how
and laugh as you wield your lopper
Enjoy your work...
