Wednesday, 31 August 2011
Tonight's tea was Toad-in-the-Hole, mash, sprouts and Mary Berry's delicious onion gravy. So quick and easy to make.... it's a gem.
For pud we'll have a small slice of Dutch Apple flan (made a large one yesterday which will see us good for a few days) and half a giant choco muffin. The muffin recipe is a Berry good one, she uses chocolate chips and white sugar I used Sainsbury's milk chocolate buttons and Muscovado... It felt so good throwing two little bags of Basics Buttons into the lumpy mix, I turned it and spooned it making sure not to overdo it, then gently splodged it into muffin cases. I have lots of muffin recipes but chocolate and blueberry are my favourites.
Going back to the toad....I sprinkled some dried sage into the Yorkshire pudding batter just to give it a speckled appearance...
The individual Yorkies domed beautifully and brought a smile to my cocoa splattered face:)
Now I must fly...My sweet tooth is waiting to be satiated. I'm also dead eager to watch a documentary about American stand-up Bill Hicks. His routines were far from routine. Check him out.
Also to be viewed soon, but not tonight is a Peter Ackroyd documentary on the Romantic poets...I'm looking forward to this, I loved his doc on London so am expecting more brilliance from the historian/presenter/writer.
Go to Youtube for more...
For pud we'll have a small slice of Dutch Apple flan (made a large one yesterday which will see us good for a few days) and half a giant choco muffin. The muffin recipe is a Berry good one, she uses chocolate chips and white sugar I used Sainsbury's milk chocolate buttons and Muscovado... It felt so good throwing two little bags of Basics Buttons into the lumpy mix, I turned it and spooned it making sure not to overdo it, then gently splodged it into muffin cases. I have lots of muffin recipes but chocolate and blueberry are my favourites.
Going back to the toad....I sprinkled some dried sage into the Yorkshire pudding batter just to give it a speckled appearance...
The individual Yorkies domed beautifully and brought a smile to my cocoa splattered face:)
Now I must fly...My sweet tooth is waiting to be satiated. I'm also dead eager to watch a documentary about American stand-up Bill Hicks. His routines were far from routine. Check him out.
Also to be viewed soon, but not tonight is a Peter Ackroyd documentary on the Romantic poets...I'm looking forward to this, I loved his doc on London so am expecting more brilliance from the historian/presenter/writer.
Go to Youtube for more...
Today I'm up to my hips in bowls because I'm making an apple pie. chocolate chip muffins and a medium cob... I love it!
Last night's The Great British Bake Off was fantastic, the girls and boys were given the task that separates the cooks from the rest of us..........The Making of Bread....I especially loved the bread baskets made from bread dough... (mmmmm must have a go).... disaster struck for a couple of the guys, but overall the standard was excellent.
Today's love quote is right on the money....
I'm on the lookout for a bookcase which I can nail to the wall..:)
Last night's The Great British Bake Off was fantastic, the girls and boys were given the task that separates the cooks from the rest of us..........The Making of Bread....I especially loved the bread baskets made from bread dough... (mmmmm must have a go).... disaster struck for a couple of the guys, but overall the standard was excellent.
Today's love quote is right on the money....
I'm on the lookout for a bookcase which I can nail to the wall..:)
Tuesday, 30 August 2011
Memories of my boy. friend.
A slash of light slithered under my door
and all at once I cried suddenly more
for on its blade pooled tears of gladness
but on its shaft the blood of my boy
My memory let rip gathering him in
recalling madly unintelligibly our time in the pit
the pit you know as love free love
the love you know as love insane
Before the bloodshed
We silently talked this boy and I
our eyes enthusing staring...undeniable joy
because when 2 are 1
the sums add up
The slash I wrote about came after his kill
when the boy became man and killed his thrill
A
and all at once I cried suddenly more
for on its blade pooled tears of gladness
but on its shaft the blood of my boy
My memory let rip gathering him in
recalling madly unintelligibly our time in the pit
the pit you know as love free love
the love you know as love insane
Before the bloodshed
We silently talked this boy and I
our eyes enthusing staring...undeniable joy
because when 2 are 1
the sums add up
The slash I wrote about came after his kill
when the boy became man and killed his thrill
A
I've treated my hands to an *expensive pair of non-latex kitchen gloves. In blue. Once my size small hands were inside I felt like washing my delicates in a bowl.
*£1:80
Cooking today:
A chick pea and veg curry, not too hot but not namby pamby either, to pick up the peas I'll bake some Irish Soda Rolls and spread them, whilst hot, with garlic and fresh coriander butter. A small bowl of raita and rice will accompany. For dessert, probably a small glass dish of vanilla ice cream.
Also being made this afternoon...Dutch apple flan, a big super friendly favourite. If kept in the fridge in keeps forever (a week) and is the perfect buddy for an afternoon cuppa with friends.
I went out the weekend. (Crikey)
On the first occasion resembling a severe rock chic, all black and leather with high shoes and attitude, the other night I was more quirky earth mother chic... as I wore a green skirt patterened up with red roses, pink cardi embellished with white cat, blue and silver jewellry and waved around a gold chained handbag. (I also relieved the tree by the pub car park of some more of its green apples.) I liked my rainbow ensemble and it's one I'd be proud to wear again whether socialising or stealing.
Tip of the Day:
Wear more colour:)
*£1:80
Cooking today:
A chick pea and veg curry, not too hot but not namby pamby either, to pick up the peas I'll bake some Irish Soda Rolls and spread them, whilst hot, with garlic and fresh coriander butter. A small bowl of raita and rice will accompany. For dessert, probably a small glass dish of vanilla ice cream.
Also being made this afternoon...Dutch apple flan, a big super friendly favourite. If kept in the fridge in keeps forever (a week) and is the perfect buddy for an afternoon cuppa with friends.
I went out the weekend. (Crikey)
On the first occasion resembling a severe rock chic, all black and leather with high shoes and attitude, the other night I was more quirky earth mother chic... as I wore a green skirt patterened up with red roses, pink cardi embellished with white cat, blue and silver jewellry and waved around a gold chained handbag. (I also relieved the tree by the pub car park of some more of its green apples.) I liked my rainbow ensemble and it's one I'd be proud to wear again whether socialising or stealing.
Tip of the Day:
Wear more colour:)
Monday, 29 August 2011
Here's Something I Won't Be Making Later...
Great British pork: from head to toe
This is a celebration of pork, taking in some of the lesser-known cuts. It’s a labour of love, but most of the cooking is done the day before.
Equipment and preparation: You will need a pressure cooker for this recipe.
Ingredients
- For the pickled pears
-
6 Williams or Conference pears
525ml/18fl oz olive oil
525ml/18fl oz white wine vinegar
1 tbsp crushed coriander seeds
6 shallots, sliced
- For the pork belly, pork cheeks and pork tenderloin
-
2kg/4lbs 8oz pork belly, bones in, skin removed, scored on the rib side
8 large pork cheeks
1.3kg/3lb pork tenderloin
4 garlic cloves, crushed
bunch fresh thyme, leaves only
bunch fresh rosemary, leaves only, chopped
splash olive oil
1 onion, finely chopped
1 carrot, finely chopped
1 celery, finely chopped
1 leek, finely sliced
2 sprigs fresh thyme
1 bay leaf
½ garlic bulb, cloves peeled
5 white peppercorns
150ml/5fl oz sherry vinegar
150ml/5fl oz Madeira
500ml/18fl oz cider
500ml/18fl oz veal stock
400ml/14fl oz brown chicken stock
50ml/2fl oz honey
large knob butter
- For the crispy pig’s ears
-
4 pig’s ears, cleaned, soaked in boiling water for one hour
1 carrot, cut into 4 pieces
1 small onion, cut into 4 pieces
1 stick of celery, cut into 4 pieces
4 garlic cloves, crushed
1 bay leaf
5 sprigs fresh thyme
5 sprigs fresh rosemary
2 litres/3½ pints chicken stock
250g/9oz coarse polenta
1 tsp smoked paprika
200g/7oz plain flour, seasoned with salt and freshly ground black pepper
3 free-range eggs, beaten
groundnut oil or vegetable oil for deep frying
- For the crackling
-
5 pork belly skins
1 onion, finely chopped
1 carrot, finely chopped
1 celery, finely chopped
1 tbsp olive oil
1 tbsp white wine vinegar
rock salt, to taste
- For the red onion compote
-
5 large red onions, finely sliced
dark brown sugar, to taste
20g/¾oz fresh thyme flowers
100ml/3½fl oz balsamic vinegar
50g/2oz honey
100ml/3½fl oz port
100ml/3½fl oz red wine
- For the black pudding trotter
-
500g/1lb 2oz good-quality black pudding, chopped into small pieces
750g/1lb 10oz puff pastry
3 free-range egg yolks
plain flour, for dusting
- For the clotted cream mash
-
1kg/2lb 4oz Ratte potatoes
250g/9oz cold butter, cut into small cubes
1 litre/1¾ pints milk
100g/3½oz Cornish clotted cream
- For the lettuce and peas
-
500g/1lb 2oz fresh peas
500g/1lb 2oz cured smoked bacon, cut into small cubes
2 Little Gem lettuces, leaves separated, chopped
50g/2oz butter
2 shallots, finely diced
1 garlic clove, finely diced
30g/1oz fresh flatleaf parsley, chopped
bunch baby watercress, trimmed
Preparation method
-
For the pickled pears, add all of the ingredients to a saucepan and cover with 2 litres/3½ pints water. Bring the mixture to the boil, then remove the pan from the heat, cover with a lid and set aside to cool for 24 hours at room temperature.
-
For the pork belly, pork cheeks and pork tenderloin, sprinkle salt and sugar over the pork belly, pork cheeks, and tenderloin and rub with the crushed garlic and herbs. Marinade in the fridge for 12 hours.
-
For the crispy pig’s ears, remove the ears from the water and place into a large saucepan with the vegetables, thyme, garlic, bay leaf and rosemary.
-
Cover with 2 litres/3½ pints water and the chicken stock and bring to the boil, reduce the heat and simmer for 3-3½ hours, or until the ears are so soft that you can pierce the skin and the white cartilage that runs through the ears.
-
Take the pan off the heat, leave to cool, then transfer the ears to a tray. Place another tray on top with a small weight and press them overnight.
-
For the crackling, place the skins on top of each other, roll up tightly and tie with butcher’s string. Place the crackling into a pressure cooker along with the vegetables and cook for 40 minutes.
-
Remove the pork skin from the pressure cooker, cover in cling film and poach in barely simmering water for eight hours. Remove from the pan and leave to chill in the fridge.
-
To cook the pork belly and pork cheeks, heat the olive oil in a frying pan and fry the marinated pork belly for 4-5 minutes, turning regularly, until browned all over. Remove the pork belly and repeat with the pork cheeks.
-
Drain off most of the oil and fry the vegetables, thyme, bay leaf, garlic, peppercorns, star anise and coriander seeds for 4-5 minutes. Deglaze the pan with the sherry vinegar and continue to cook until the volume of the liquid has reduced by half. Add the Madeira and cider and continue to cook until the volume of the liquid has reduced by half again, then add the veal stock and chicken stock and bring to the boil. Season with salt and freshly ground black pepper, then pour the mixture into the pressure cooker, add the pork belly and pork cheeks and cook for 40 minutes. Remove the pork cheeks and place into iced water, cook the pork belly for a further 20 minutes. Remove the pork belly and place into iced water, reserving the cooking liquor.
-
Remove the pork cheeks and pork belly, place the pork belly between two baking trays and chill in the fridge for one hour with a weight on top. Set the pork cheeks aside.
-
Cut the pork belly into ‘lollipops’ by cutting squares with the rib bones sticking out.
-
Strain the cooking liquor into a saucepan and continue to cook until the liquid has reduced and thickened.
-
Reserve some of this gravy for serving and continue to cook the remaining liquid until very thick.
-
Stir in the honey, then add the pork belly and cheeks, making sure they are covered in the glaze. Set aside and warm through before serving.
-
For the crackling, preheat the oven to 150C/300F/Gas 2.
-
Remove the cling film from the pork skins and slice into thin discs. Place the discs onto a baking tray lined with greaseproof paper. Rub with the olive oil and vinegar and sprinkle with rock salt. Cover with another layer of greaseproof paper and place a tray on top.
-
Roast in the oven for 40 minutes to one hour, or until crisp.
-
To cook the pork tenderloin, bring a large pan of water to the boil, then remove the pan from the heat. Wrap the marinated pork tenderloin in cling film, making sure it is water-tight. Poach in the water for 20 minutes. Remove the pork from the water, remove the cling film and set aside to rest for five minutes. Cut the pork into four chops.
-
Just before serving, heat the butter in a frying pan and fry the pork chops for 5-10 minutes, or until browned all over.
-
For the red onion compote, add the onions to a saucepan and sprinkle with salt (to taste) and sugar. Cook for 4-5 minutes, or until the onions are translucent. Add the thyme flowers, balsamic vinegar and honey and cook until the mixture is syrupy.
-
Add the port and red wine and simmer for one hour, or until the onions are very soft and coated in a thick sauce.
-
To finish the pickled pears, remove the pears from the pan, peel, cut in half lengthways and remove the pips. Return the pears to the cold pickling liquid and bring to a simmer. Cook the pears for 5-6 minutes, or until tender. Remove the pan from the heat and set aside to cool. Remove the pears from the pan, cut into 1cm/½in cubes and stir into the red onion compote.
-
For the black pudding trotter, place the black pudding into a bowl and season with salt. Set aside somewhere warm for an hour, or until soft and pliable.
-
Meanwhile, roll the puff pastry out to 3mm/⅛in thickness, dust lightly with flour, transfer to a baking tray lined with greaseproof paper and leave to chill in the fridge.
-
Shape the black pudding into a sausage shape and place it into the middle of the puff pastry. Brush the edge of the pastry with some of the beaten egg and wrap it around the black pudding. Trim off the excess pastry so that you have a sausage roll with excess pastry on one end.
-
Using a picture of a pig’s trotter for reference, press one end of the excess pastry together and cut out two 'V's to resemble the toes of the trotter.
-
Chill in the fridge for one hour, then brush with the beaten egg and chill for a further 30 minutes.
-
Preheat the oven to 180C/350F/Gas 4.
-
Bake the black pudding trotter for 15-18 minutes, or until golden-brown and the pastry is cooked through.
-
For the clotted cream mash, place the potatoes into a pan of cold water, season with salt, bring to a simmer and cook for 10-15 minutes, or until soft.
-
Remove the pan from the heat, drain the potatoes and carefully peel each potato and push through a potato ricer into a clean saucepan. Beat in the cold butter, a little at a time.
-
Meanwhile, bring the milk to the boil in a small pan and stir it into the mash until smooth and creamy (you might not need all the milk). Stir in the clotted cream and season to taste with salt and freshly ground black pepper.
-
For the lettuce and peas, cook the peas in a pan of boiling water for 2-3 minutes, or until cooked through.
-
Place the bacon into a pan, cover with cold water and bring to the boil. Drain the bacon and pat dry with kitchen paper.
-
Heat the olive oil and 25g/1oz of the butter in a frying pan and fry the shallots and garlic for 4-5 minutes, or until softened. Remove the shallots from the pan.
-
Heat the remaining butter in the pan used to cook the shallots and fry the bacon for 1-2 minutes, or until caramelised. Drain off a little bit of the excess fat and stir in the lettuce. Stir in the shallots, peas and parsley and season with white pepper. Stir in the watercress just before serving.
-
For the crispy pig’s ears, mix the polenta and smoked paprika on a large tray. Sprinkle the flour onto a tray and whisk the egg in a bowl.
-
Trim the pig’s ears into 1cm x 4cm/½in x 1½in strips. Coat the strips in the flour, dip in the egg and coat in the polenta mixture. Place the strips onto a baking tray and freeze for five minutes.
-
Meanwhile, heat the groundnut oil in a deep, heavy-bottomed saucepan and heat until a small cube of bread sizzles and turns golden-brown when dropped into it. (CAUTION: hot oil can be dangerous. Do not leave unattended.)
-
Deep-fry the strips for 2-3 minutes, or until golden-brown. Remove from the pan with a slotted spoon and set aside to drain on kitchen paper. Sprinkle with a little rock salt.
-
To serve, place all of the components onto serving platters for everyone to help themselves.
I found this epic epicurean concoction on the BBC's food website.
However.....
Among the goodies I'm cooking this week are.... Chick Pea Curry and Creole Spaghetti, great sounding noshes which consist of simple ingredients available to all..Unlike the beauty above...Where WOULD one find a hogs cheek and a pair of sow's shell-likes.....See above pic....
More cooking spiel tomorrow...:)
Yikes! look at the time...I must fly>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
If you click on the 'red underlined words' you'll go through to the BBC website
Friday, 26 August 2011
Simple Things Please.....
Lovely
2. Sweet and sour chicken, fried egg rice and pancake rolls. Tonight with 'Cronos'.
3. Three blue and white enamel pie plates. I hugged them as I walked out of the charity shop. £1:20. Will christen the smallest one by baking a cherry pie.
4. Baking books piled up alongside cake stands and bun tins. No more feeling the need for precision ornamentation.
5. All blue jewellry. Heavy goth style necklace, enamel bangle, blue diamond ear rings. All these in partnership with my new best eye shadow, sky blue.
6. Happy with hair. Very short and silver. Cool. Funky. Mental.
7. 'New' smoky pink nightie. Could be worn as a dress but would need a hot day.
8. Tiny Tart Tins. For tiny tarts. Baby jam, baby lemon curd and baby choco.
9. Banana Fluff. Dessert for next week. Domed and yellow with buried banana.
10. Tea and biscuits. Forever my panacea. New fine bone china Istria mug for new teabags. A lovely blue and white mug, its design coming for the archives of the Victoria and Albert Museum. The P.G. Tips Tea Bags coming from Sainsburys.
And looking forward to weekend...
Wednesday, 24 August 2011
Witterings
I've just read that former Home Secretary Jacqui Smith used two day-release prisoners to decorate her luxury home when they should have been working in the 'community'.
Ms Smith's greed and cunning renders me almost speechless.
*I wonder if I could grab-a-bad-lad to help with my interiors.
My hair looks cute after Lisa's visit. She really does a good job on me. But her silly remarks about women who choose to stay grey left me wondering...Oh well she's a decent enough woman who charges little and likes handbags as much as I do. So I'll put up with her.
I'm still choking whenever I glance at my recipe books....must be that I feel abandoned by them...... They have always, in the past at least, been something I could rely on for comfort and succour, but now they seem to be rigid and without heart. A bit like seeing a former lover after a long times absence. You loved me then now you can't even look me in the eye.
Today's food is...........
Sausage Saxony (Mary Berry recipe) served with creamy herb mash and peas.
Pud will probably be ice cream....
And I must just mention last night's pud, ditched the ice cream in favour of a baked apple and evaporated milk. The apple was one I plundered from the pub..... and after scooping out it's core with a paring knife I filled the cavity with raisins, sultanas and brown sugar, then, to make a bit of 'gravy', I poured in a little cold water and butter.
Result? A tender sweet fleshed mess.
At sometime, God knows when, I'll catch up on last night's The Great British Bake Off...I'm looking forward to meeting the contestants and seeing what they create. Also love Mary Berry overlooking it all and the other judge, Paul Hollywood, shouldn't be anywhere near a kitchen he's more fitted to a movie set. Goo goo...
Now I must fly..................:)
Ms Smith's greed and cunning renders me almost speechless.
*I wonder if I could grab-a-bad-lad to help with my interiors.
My hair looks cute after Lisa's visit. She really does a good job on me. But her silly remarks about women who choose to stay grey left me wondering...Oh well she's a decent enough woman who charges little and likes handbags as much as I do. So I'll put up with her.
I'm still choking whenever I glance at my recipe books....must be that I feel abandoned by them...... They have always, in the past at least, been something I could rely on for comfort and succour, but now they seem to be rigid and without heart. A bit like seeing a former lover after a long times absence. You loved me then now you can't even look me in the eye.
Today's food is...........
Sausage Saxony (Mary Berry recipe) served with creamy herb mash and peas.
Pud will probably be ice cream....
And I must just mention last night's pud, ditched the ice cream in favour of a baked apple and evaporated milk. The apple was one I plundered from the pub..... and after scooping out it's core with a paring knife I filled the cavity with raisins, sultanas and brown sugar, then, to make a bit of 'gravy', I poured in a little cold water and butter.
Result? A tender sweet fleshed mess.
At sometime, God knows when, I'll catch up on last night's The Great British Bake Off...I'm looking forward to meeting the contestants and seeing what they create. Also love Mary Berry overlooking it all and the other judge, Paul Hollywood, shouldn't be anywhere near a kitchen he's more fitted to a movie set. Goo goo...
Now I must fly..................:)
Tuesday, 23 August 2011
Tonight's Eats
What started out as a Bolognaise has ended up as a Hot Pot
Oblong baking dish filled with browned minced beef, mixed veg, (swede, celery, turnip, carrot, onion, peas) and beef stock. Added to this.... some Worcestershire sauce, torn parsley, dried thyme and s&p. As my fat intake is dangerously high on account of the earlier Cornish Pasty I'll ditch the planned dumplings in favour of a scalloped potato topping.
No need for extras, but a little mustard on the side might be nice.
No pud.
Lie.
Choc Ice:)
Oblong baking dish filled with browned minced beef, mixed veg, (swede, celery, turnip, carrot, onion, peas) and beef stock. Added to this.... some Worcestershire sauce, torn parsley, dried thyme and s&p. As my fat intake is dangerously high on account of the earlier Cornish Pasty I'll ditch the planned dumplings in favour of a scalloped potato topping.
No need for extras, but a little mustard on the side might be nice.
No pud.
Lie.
Choc Ice:)
It's Not Funny
Aaaarghhhh.
Waves rushing over me...not only rain ones, but anxiety ones too. Did not have a pleasant morning.
Lumps of depression cutting off my airways, bolts of heavy duty worry making me nauseous and my hairdresser can't do me until late afternoon.
Everything is catching up with me now I think, all this to-do with endless amounts of form filling, phone lines busy, press 1 and all that crap, go here go there send it back have you sent it yet and we want our money off of your grieving Mother..sorry...etc etc etc... and then to top it all a gut wrenching sudden awareness that dad's chair will never be filled again. Mother is so out of touch with council tax and the necessity for longlife milk and her once fat cupboard stocked with salmon and Alpen and chocolate digestives is now pitifully half stocked with cornflakes and tins of dad's odds and ends. A death cupboard if ever I saw one.
All this on top of 'our' stuff too. Mr H & I.
If I had a crutch I'd lean on it.
I feel the need to do the whole out with old in with the new type thing, but it's hard when all you have is old and have little prospect of getting some new.
Maybe I should phone the Samaritans or drink or visit Citizens Advice.
1. I'm not suicidal much.
2. I cant waste money on drink when I can't afford lamb chops.
3. Citizens Advice Bureaux. How did these debts arise? Er...by living.
My hair needs cutting.
And I want to run away to somewhere hot with a man called ? who I sort of know. But I won't of of course on account of liking and loving Mr H.
Talking of loving, it is the best of feelings you know and the only one worth fighting/dying/dying your hair for/risking all for....
And I will fight for the things I love because I kind of feel I'm losing them.
1. My love of Recipe Books. Recently cried when glancing at Hamlyn's Favourite Tea Time Bakes
2. My mind. It is in a muddle.
3. Everything I cherish really. Simples homelife, sleep filled nights and having a laugh.
Now I'm having a Cornish Pasty
Waves rushing over me...not only rain ones, but anxiety ones too. Did not have a pleasant morning.
Lumps of depression cutting off my airways, bolts of heavy duty worry making me nauseous and my hairdresser can't do me until late afternoon.
Everything is catching up with me now I think, all this to-do with endless amounts of form filling, phone lines busy, press 1 and all that crap, go here go there send it back have you sent it yet and we want our money off of your grieving Mother..sorry...etc etc etc... and then to top it all a gut wrenching sudden awareness that dad's chair will never be filled again. Mother is so out of touch with council tax and the necessity for longlife milk and her once fat cupboard stocked with salmon and Alpen and chocolate digestives is now pitifully half stocked with cornflakes and tins of dad's odds and ends. A death cupboard if ever I saw one.
All this on top of 'our' stuff too. Mr H & I.
If I had a crutch I'd lean on it.
I feel the need to do the whole out with old in with the new type thing, but it's hard when all you have is old and have little prospect of getting some new.
Maybe I should phone the Samaritans or drink or visit Citizens Advice.
1. I'm not suicidal much.
2. I cant waste money on drink when I can't afford lamb chops.
3. Citizens Advice Bureaux. How did these debts arise? Er...by living.
My hair needs cutting.
And I want to run away to somewhere hot with a man called ? who I sort of know. But I won't of of course on account of liking and loving Mr H.
Talking of loving, it is the best of feelings you know and the only one worth fighting/dying/dying your hair for/risking all for....
And I will fight for the things I love because I kind of feel I'm losing them.
1. My love of Recipe Books. Recently cried when glancing at Hamlyn's Favourite Tea Time Bakes
2. My mind. It is in a muddle.
3. Everything I cherish really. Simples homelife, sleep filled nights and having a laugh.
Now I'm having a Cornish Pasty
Monday, 22 August 2011
Housewifery::A Fine Profession
Tonight's menu is:
Braised steak and onions...Canned from M&S. Will shake in some Worcestershire sauce to give it man appeal.
Mashed potato...From a Smash packet. Buttered to a higher level.
Garden peas.....Simmered from frozen. Will tart up with pepper sugar and salt.
Strawberry Jam Sponge...Completely homemade but will be nuked ( 210 seconds) instead of steamed for two hours:)
Hot Strawberry Blancmange....Pearce & Duffs. This pink goo is lovely cold and set but equally yummy hot and pouring. Try it.
This shocking meal is on account of not having enough time to cook properly and that is on account of spending a lovingly long time in the embrace of Mother.
She's going through it at the moment and I need and want to be there in order to pull her through it. Can't have my best girl sinking...So that's why I'm cheating at cooking.
But it all looks good, and I'm especially excited about pudding...
I see the X Factor is fixed. Some blonde girl allegedly 26, has been around the block doing stuff and was approached by X Factor people...She knows nothing of course. And you know what? I don't care a jot. I enjoy the loudness and lies and pure silliness of it . It's an escape from nesw about life and death.
So bring on the cute kids, gormless deluded shelf fillers and older-than-they-say gals:)
I am SO busily hectic this week and me with my condition too......trust me I won't over informatize you, suffice to say it's down to being over half a century old.
Christ.
* I see The Great British Bake-Off is on telly tomorrow night. If it's as exciting as the first series then I'll be a Happy Cooker. Love Sue and Mel's hosting of it and love and adore judges Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood. Baking makes me cry, it's so wonderful.
* When out and about with Mum I bought another handbag....And it is the handbag equivalent of how I like my males. Plenty of roomage, fat when full, tan brown, soft in the bottom and BIG:)
Goodnight All......
Braised steak and onions...Canned from M&S. Will shake in some Worcestershire sauce to give it man appeal.
Mashed potato...From a Smash packet. Buttered to a higher level.
Garden peas.....Simmered from frozen. Will tart up with pepper sugar and salt.
Strawberry Jam Sponge...Completely homemade but will be nuked ( 210 seconds) instead of steamed for two hours:)
Hot Strawberry Blancmange....Pearce & Duffs. This pink goo is lovely cold and set but equally yummy hot and pouring. Try it.
This shocking meal is on account of not having enough time to cook properly and that is on account of spending a lovingly long time in the embrace of Mother.
She's going through it at the moment and I need and want to be there in order to pull her through it. Can't have my best girl sinking...So that's why I'm cheating at cooking.
But it all looks good, and I'm especially excited about pudding...
I see the X Factor is fixed. Some blonde girl allegedly 26, has been around the block doing stuff and was approached by X Factor people...She knows nothing of course. And you know what? I don't care a jot. I enjoy the loudness and lies and pure silliness of it . It's an escape from nesw about life and death.
So bring on the cute kids, gormless deluded shelf fillers and older-than-they-say gals:)
I am SO busily hectic this week and me with my condition too......trust me I won't over informatize you, suffice to say it's down to being over half a century old.
Christ.
* I see The Great British Bake-Off is on telly tomorrow night. If it's as exciting as the first series then I'll be a Happy Cooker. Love Sue and Mel's hosting of it and love and adore judges Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood. Baking makes me cry, it's so wonderful.
* When out and about with Mum I bought another handbag....And it is the handbag equivalent of how I like my males. Plenty of roomage, fat when full, tan brown, soft in the bottom and BIG:)
Goodnight All......
Sunday, 21 August 2011
Oh Come On...
Goldie 50+ Here take That....
Janet 16...Pure and Lovely
Frankie 18 Geezer
Loved and laughed with bit-of-rough Frankie boy, and then fell deeply in love with Irish Red Riding Hood aka Miss Devlin.
Others? Pure overflow.
Except the Chinese lady, who I liked as soon as I saw her strings, and her fit impersonation of Tina, making me wooooo and be convinced that as soon as gals hit 50+ they either let themselves go or let themselves go.
The new bad cop, Gary Barlow, did his best to be bad, uttering no after no after no but it was Louis Walsh who, as usual, played good cop. The lady judges were ok, but moi, being out of touch with current trends failed to know them. The one sitting next to Louis was 23, but had the worldliness of a woman much longer in the tooth, show biz obviously an ageing profession, the other bird, an American, emoted and I liked emotion. Give me tears, whether true or false, and I'm yours.
*Apparently there's been boozing, bullying and sex going on behind the scenes. Blasted fun these people have, me, plead guilty to two.*
In the lingo of today....I do love X Factor:)
Friday, 19 August 2011
Mr H. is doing an overnighter so I won't be cooking tonight, because cooking for one is a dismal affair.
Will keep my little boiler stoked by dipping biscuits in milk. But while watching 'Saw' I'll probably eat a small steak and sup Brandified Coffee. Yum.
So...with a Madness of Movies to keep me company and the curtains drawn in my lightless room I'll be in Seventh Hell:)
Goodnight All.
x
A Stroll
I walked down to the shops, not for anything in particular, just wanted to enjoy the surroundings.
Saw a black haired boy and his red bike, a wiry senior citizen and his stick and then as I passed home after home I felt overwhelmingly saddened by the sight of so many perfectly structured, organised front gardens.
It must take tremendous effort, skill and money to create such perfection...
I wondered what people thought of mine. Scruffy probably. Mine with it's much loved weeds and falling rose petals. Mine with it's weirdly pruned Rosemary and Forsythia and overloaded chipboard bird table. It's not that I don't care how it looks, it's just that I don't want a glossy shaved to death lawn and soldier type flowers standing erect in line after line. These things are alive after all. And whether I cut or feed or not the blossoms still come to please.
Walking.....Two pale yellow butterflies, maybe they were white, I don't know, they each in turn crowded in front of me, dashing across my tummy fast like having been scared or overcome by something either predatory or beautiful. What's in their heads I wondered as I lost them in neighbours flower beds. Two. At different times. Both behaving the same way, both gorgeous. The thought of nailing one to a sheet of paper and imprisoning it behind glass makes me murderous.
The charity shop was closed.
Re-opening again the end of August in another place, nearby.
I was lost.
Nowhere to browse and nothing to hold. So I stepped into the chemists for lady's things.
The gabbling pretty brunette girl serving was quick on her feet and light in the head.
On the corner of my road, an elderly lady's bungalow, I know the occupant is elderly because I've see her outside re-arranging pots. Her ornaments though are what I want.
One in particular. Small... measuring maybe 8 inches across and 7 inches high.
Made of Stone I expect...A head-scarfed woman sitting on a bench. Her grey dull weathered feet flat, her knees slightly spread... face I couldn't quite see, head bent, but in my mind I knew what the figure was thinking and I knew this because of the type of woman who put her there...
The Stone lady was set for eternity thinking... probably about the man she lost who was probably the man she loved.
Women, whether made of rock or flesh, feel like that.
:)
Saw a black haired boy and his red bike, a wiry senior citizen and his stick and then as I passed home after home I felt overwhelmingly saddened by the sight of so many perfectly structured, organised front gardens.
It must take tremendous effort, skill and money to create such perfection...
I wondered what people thought of mine. Scruffy probably. Mine with it's much loved weeds and falling rose petals. Mine with it's weirdly pruned Rosemary and Forsythia and overloaded chipboard bird table. It's not that I don't care how it looks, it's just that I don't want a glossy shaved to death lawn and soldier type flowers standing erect in line after line. These things are alive after all. And whether I cut or feed or not the blossoms still come to please.
Walking.....Two pale yellow butterflies, maybe they were white, I don't know, they each in turn crowded in front of me, dashing across my tummy fast like having been scared or overcome by something either predatory or beautiful. What's in their heads I wondered as I lost them in neighbours flower beds. Two. At different times. Both behaving the same way, both gorgeous. The thought of nailing one to a sheet of paper and imprisoning it behind glass makes me murderous.
The charity shop was closed.
Re-opening again the end of August in another place, nearby.
I was lost.
Nowhere to browse and nothing to hold. So I stepped into the chemists for lady's things.
The gabbling pretty brunette girl serving was quick on her feet and light in the head.
On the corner of my road, an elderly lady's bungalow, I know the occupant is elderly because I've see her outside re-arranging pots. Her ornaments though are what I want.
One in particular. Small... measuring maybe 8 inches across and 7 inches high.
Made of Stone I expect...A head-scarfed woman sitting on a bench. Her grey dull weathered feet flat, her knees slightly spread... face I couldn't quite see, head bent, but in my mind I knew what the figure was thinking and I knew this because of the type of woman who put her there...
The Stone lady was set for eternity thinking... probably about the man she lost who was probably the man she loved.
Women, whether made of rock or flesh, feel like that.
:)
Thursday, 18 August 2011
After a short stay with us Mum went home today. The long way. Her preference for bus rides made me wonder, when not wondering I noted street names.
Looking at Her body, what there is of it, brought forth tears, not inside, but outside, in the heavy rain. Stinging like wasps they ruined my eyes. But weren't noticed.
My insides were outside as she stumbled by the potted plants in Marks and Spencers. Security guard kind and smiley.
Stung again.
Respite in Chris's shop where the good Catholic lady, all heart and puffed hair, let me take a handbag for less than the marked price.
She also gave us a Burberry umbrella.
Outside mum couldn't walk.
Wasp stings again.
Our trek back to her place was hard, rain and wind and feeling like foreigners in our own country but I felt only love for everyone, except the smug fat rich who were alive and plump with gin and cake. Them I despised. Not for their heavy bags but for their pulsing hearts.
Mum couldn't make it without stopping every yard. I laughed and told her to go on. "Nearly there" I said as another slippery slope appeared.
This is hurting.
I can't say much about the fish and chip lunch except that it cost a lot and that mum didn't care.
We both bought books. Hers a biography of Rita Hayworth, mine 'Staying Alive' real poems for unreal times edited by Neil Astley and signed by him.
Apt.
As I got out of the train tonight my insides were back inside and I opened my mouth to drink in the rain.
Looking at Her body, what there is of it, brought forth tears, not inside, but outside, in the heavy rain. Stinging like wasps they ruined my eyes. But weren't noticed.
My insides were outside as she stumbled by the potted plants in Marks and Spencers. Security guard kind and smiley.
Stung again.
Respite in Chris's shop where the good Catholic lady, all heart and puffed hair, let me take a handbag for less than the marked price.
She also gave us a Burberry umbrella.
Outside mum couldn't walk.
Wasp stings again.
Our trek back to her place was hard, rain and wind and feeling like foreigners in our own country but I felt only love for everyone, except the smug fat rich who were alive and plump with gin and cake. Them I despised. Not for their heavy bags but for their pulsing hearts.
Mum couldn't make it without stopping every yard. I laughed and told her to go on. "Nearly there" I said as another slippery slope appeared.
This is hurting.
I can't say much about the fish and chip lunch except that it cost a lot and that mum didn't care.
We both bought books. Hers a biography of Rita Hayworth, mine 'Staying Alive' real poems for unreal times edited by Neil Astley and signed by him.
Apt.
As I got out of the train tonight my insides were back inside and I opened my mouth to drink in the rain.
Wednesday, 17 August 2011
Mother Is In The House
"Just a bit of middle aged spread" Mother said as I screeched whilst poking rolls of glutinous tummy blubber
(Thanks ma)
"Yes liver is nice, but well done" She said as I cracked my brain trying to coax her into eating something a little more adventurous than beans on toast.
(Liver is now chilling waiting to be very well done)
"No more fruit, it does things to me"
Ah yes it certainly does, and always in the middle of the night too, thank you dear:(
Mother is in the house...
On the other hand...
"You're a soldier" She said as I did man's work.
You look beautiful" As I fluffed my hair into the shape of an old walnut whip
"Here take this, go on, buy yourself something"
"Mmmm what a nice red" I said
and
"Thanks Ang" After I helped with ablutions.
Having Mum in the bungalow is a bit like embracing a very old warhorse, she's gorgeous in a crumbling sort of way, her mane of hair thinning and grey, her gait so bloody slow, but her manner royal...quiet and unassuming.
I am worried about her though.
She's pale and thin but steadfastly colours up with blusher and lipstick, and she eats everything I cook. Last night's Toad in the Hole being a total success, likewise the blackberry and stolen apple crumble. I served it upside down like a Tarte Tatin with spoonfuls of vanilla ice cream on the side. It looked lovely.
Sleeping wise she's out by ten propped up with pillows and with a flowered scarf around her hair. A tiny tiny lady with big blue eyes who sometimes talks with them. Like last night when we spoke about Him, she went away when she remembered, went back to last year and before, and wherever she went it was a place which brought happiness and then, with a sudden cruel switch she realized her loss, our loss. But hers mostly. And then her eyes stuck firmly on the bedroom mirror wondering if he'd make another appearance...
Today has been hectic again, not for her, for me. "I'd rather go solo to sainsbury's " I said at 8
"Don't you want me to come?"
"No, you stay in and do the wash-up, earn your liver and onions"
When I got home the dishes were washed and dried and left piled by the kettle.
After putting the groceries away I made some tea and put mum away. On the settee she now sits, eyes closed, hands gathered watching and listening to " The Bone Collector"
Gives me a chance to soak her liver and blog. :)
Monday, 15 August 2011
Saty Calm and Drink Tea
Having a hectic day.
My handbag just WON'T do. So small, so tight. So unable to deal with real life. So me.......
A hoard of 'lifted' apples demand peeling. Pies, crumbles and possible pork accompaniment. This is payback time for being a tea-leaf. Got my stuff stashed and now every time I open the fridge the Apples Bang:( USE ME, USE ME...
A torrent of stuff to do (this week) and not a helping hand on show. I will though be strong in the execution of my duties, I won't say chores, because I hate the word. CHORES. Chores brings to mind buckets and skivvies bent down without hope, head in the grate and not a lot on the plate....Duties bring to mind stiffness. Of collar and spine.
Films I MUST see:
The one where the APES rise. Something to do with the old Planet of the Apes films. His eyes, his eyes....Mmmmm. One look from those and I'd be done for bestiality. Laugh....
Cowboys v. Aliens. Or something. Only seen brief clips on tv, I do know however that Daniel Craig stars. At least I THINK it was him glowering at me on Liverpool Street station.
And finally...Shock horror in the form of Destination 500, another soppy film, similar I dare say to Destinations 1-500. I don't mind if it's a re-hash, if the ridiculous plot makes no sense at all, as long as it makes me grab the arm of the bloke next to me.
And THAT, m'dears, is all you need to know...
Now I must CARRY ON>>>>>>>>>>>>
x
My handbag just WON'T do. So small, so tight. So unable to deal with real life. So me.......
A hoard of 'lifted' apples demand peeling. Pies, crumbles and possible pork accompaniment. This is payback time for being a tea-leaf. Got my stuff stashed and now every time I open the fridge the Apples Bang:( USE ME, USE ME...
A torrent of stuff to do (this week) and not a helping hand on show. I will though be strong in the execution of my duties, I won't say chores, because I hate the word. CHORES. Chores brings to mind buckets and skivvies bent down without hope, head in the grate and not a lot on the plate....Duties bring to mind stiffness. Of collar and spine.
Films I MUST see:
The one where the APES rise. Something to do with the old Planet of the Apes films. His eyes, his eyes....Mmmmm. One look from those and I'd be done for bestiality. Laugh....
Cowboys v. Aliens. Or something. Only seen brief clips on tv, I do know however that Daniel Craig stars. At least I THINK it was him glowering at me on Liverpool Street station.
And finally...Shock horror in the form of Destination 500, another soppy film, similar I dare say to Destinations 1-500. I don't mind if it's a re-hash, if the ridiculous plot makes no sense at all, as long as it makes me grab the arm of the bloke next to me.
And THAT, m'dears, is all you need to know...
Now I must CARRY ON>>>>>>>>>>>>
x
Sunday, 14 August 2011
Report me to David Cameron, may the Daily Mail pontificate on broken Britain under a blurry picture of me about my wanton looting.
I'm putting my hands up to this, I'm being dragged to the Beak's Bench, it's a fair cop, it's me wot done it.
I have been scrumping.
Only the apples weren't quite available to be scrumped on account of them not being fallen, I did indeed, have to reach up, by the car, to pluck the hard green fruit tantalizingly dangling from the bough of the tall tree which overhangs the pub car park.
"Remember Eve!" Yelped Mr H.
This pomme didn't need no serpent to lisp his encouragement for me to STEAL!
Only worry..is that the pub's surveillance camera was plugged in.
Be prepared to see me on Crimewatch's Rogue Gallery as someone that the Essex Old Bill would like to have a word with.
(Hopefully in a cell with three fully appointed coppers)
Mmmmmm.
Pie anyone?
I'm putting my hands up to this, I'm being dragged to the Beak's Bench, it's a fair cop, it's me wot done it.
I have been scrumping.
Only the apples weren't quite available to be scrumped on account of them not being fallen, I did indeed, have to reach up, by the car, to pluck the hard green fruit tantalizingly dangling from the bough of the tall tree which overhangs the pub car park.
"Remember Eve!" Yelped Mr H.
This pomme didn't need no serpent to lisp his encouragement for me to STEAL!
Only worry..is that the pub's surveillance camera was plugged in.
Be prepared to see me on Crimewatch's Rogue Gallery as someone that the Essex Old Bill would like to have a word with.
(Hopefully in a cell with three fully appointed coppers)
Mmmmmm.
Pie anyone?
Saturday, 13 August 2011
A Girl's Night In
Denim shirt. Me Butch
Jeans. Me Petite.
Bloody Steak. Babe Rips.
Wrestling. Actorly fun fest from USA.
Press-Ups. Not one-handed. Yet.
Televisual Real Life Cop Action. Mmmmm.
Chinese Delivery. Ditto.
'Rocky II' Blood and Shorts
Now...
Pre-recorded 'Deathwatch'
XX chromosome malfunction
Y?
Jeans. Me Petite.
Bloody Steak. Babe Rips.
Wrestling. Actorly fun fest from USA.
Press-Ups. Not one-handed. Yet.
Televisual Real Life Cop Action. Mmmmm.
Chinese Delivery. Ditto.
'Rocky II' Blood and Shorts
Now...
Pre-recorded 'Deathwatch'
XX chromosome malfunction
Y?
Friday, 12 August 2011
Cooking tonight:
Sausage Saxony...
A rich warm concoction consisting of good pork snorkers, chopped red onion, snipped smoked bacon and various dried and fresh herbs braised in oxtail soup and to soak up the yummy juices...some creamy mashed potatoes.
For pud: Chunked Bananas and Hot Chocolate Blancmange.
*I see The X Factor is returning to a screen near you, have to admit to being pleased about that. It's a guilty pleasure of mine...
Utter nonsense and probably fixed but I don't mind, as long as I get to root for someone then that's all I care about.
* My shoulder is giving me the pip. Same one as last time, the left one. Current pain coming from me thinking I'm a mini-weightlifter. Carrying mum's shopping bags on account of her a) 8st body unable to clutch even a bag of cod and chips b) Her insistence on buying every women's mag in the shop and c) Being blind to my own very special needs, pains and joint troubles.
Love, you see, is not only blind, it's daft aswell.
Yadder yadder.....
I hope to have an excellent weekend, by excellent I mean doing what I want, with whom I want and where I want...probably the kitchen:)
I feel a Mass of Muffins on the way.
Yikes..look at the time...I must fly>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
*
Sausage Saxony...
A rich warm concoction consisting of good pork snorkers, chopped red onion, snipped smoked bacon and various dried and fresh herbs braised in oxtail soup and to soak up the yummy juices...some creamy mashed potatoes.
For pud: Chunked Bananas and Hot Chocolate Blancmange.
*I see The X Factor is returning to a screen near you, have to admit to being pleased about that. It's a guilty pleasure of mine...
Utter nonsense and probably fixed but I don't mind, as long as I get to root for someone then that's all I care about.
* My shoulder is giving me the pip. Same one as last time, the left one. Current pain coming from me thinking I'm a mini-weightlifter. Carrying mum's shopping bags on account of her a) 8st body unable to clutch even a bag of cod and chips b) Her insistence on buying every women's mag in the shop and c) Being blind to my own very special needs, pains and joint troubles.
Love, you see, is not only blind, it's daft aswell.
Yadder yadder.....
I hope to have an excellent weekend, by excellent I mean doing what I want, with whom I want and where I want...probably the kitchen:)
I feel a Mass of Muffins on the way.
Yikes..look at the time...I must fly>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
*
Tuesday, 9 August 2011
A lump of concrete in my chest.
Blinded by tears and fears as I stared soilidly at frozen tv dinners not really wanting one, but it was a clear space and I needed space.
Then like a weakling........
Cried when nice lady cashier asked how I was. Barbie held my hand her red painted nails digging into my palm. I like Barbie. She's alright. My age probably but far more secure. I'm sure.
Then.
Stood in middle of the half filled car park looking up at screaming seagulls. The sky was religiously wondrous, a vast canvas daubed wishily washily in watery blue.
The noisy birds swarming overhead wreaked fear into the hearts of other more sedate birds.
The sun thereabouts, in then out.
Home slowly to tea and riot news.
Sunday, 7 August 2011
Only The Good Stuff...
Toying with the idea of doing a gig.
A bar nearby has open mic sessions every other Wednesday for singers, musicians and poets, Might be barmy enough to have a go.
It could take my aching mind off of the gruesome stuff that has taken up squatters rights inside my head.
So, when I get a mo, I'll look through my work...
Or...write something especially.
I know the bar because my old 'employer' Henry once took me there. Damn near had an accident too, almost landed on a grass verge, silly sod. (He was a rubbish driver.)
But as usual I laughed it off... but down inside, way down in the deepest mess of my innards I thought I'd/we'd had it!
But we survived and I enjoyed a cool drink in the evening sun.
Talking of surviving...
I want to.
Got a lot to give, want little in return save a packed purse, positive news on many fronts and the occasional romp.
X
A bar nearby has open mic sessions every other Wednesday for singers, musicians and poets, Might be barmy enough to have a go.
It could take my aching mind off of the gruesome stuff that has taken up squatters rights inside my head.
So, when I get a mo, I'll look through my work...
Or...write something especially.
I know the bar because my old 'employer' Henry once took me there. Damn near had an accident too, almost landed on a grass verge, silly sod. (He was a rubbish driver.)
But as usual I laughed it off... but down inside, way down in the deepest mess of my innards I thought I'd/we'd had it!
But we survived and I enjoyed a cool drink in the evening sun.
Talking of surviving...
I want to.
Got a lot to give, want little in return save a packed purse, positive news on many fronts and the occasional romp.
X
Thursday, 4 August 2011
I don't embrace change. In fact I loathe being shoved outside my comfort zone. But sometimes, as Sam Cooke said, A Change Is Gonna Come. Or in me and John's case a Change Is Gotta Come!
Whether we like it or not.
Bugger.
As I write this.... a few minor life altering decisions need to be made, but I am not in the best frame of mind at the mo to make them or fix what needs fixing or anything like that...
So I'll pray to my God to at least allow me to see the wonderful trees through our blackened wood. And then we'll get moving. Possibly literally.
Blast.
Sainsbury's seemed like Heaven to me this morning. Cool, white and a haven for lost souls.
There were very few lady shoppers and only one or two gents. One guy paying particular attention to my dithering over Red Onions. As I prodded and tested the deep glossy red flesh of a small one to see if it was fit for purpose I smelled his heavy scent... "Was he useable?" I thought..."I bet he is" and then his gruff tones broke my onion revelry..."A net is better value".
Oh baby...
And so as I dropped my net into the small poor people's trolley I thought, if He, the man in the rugged blue shirt would give me his money I could give him his youth back.
Prid Pro Quo Grandad.
I smiled real slow... just enough to make him happy... and trollied off leaving him stiff by the new potatoes.
Coochy.
Then home in a storm.
And to a storm.
Blimey!
But I am a Soldier and one who is used to small conflicts
But this is a Filthy Lucre War and war is big and war is bloody and war is tiring and we might get a pasting but I've no doubt we'll finally smile.......even if it's a toothless one:)
Whether we like it or not.
Bugger.
As I write this.... a few minor life altering decisions need to be made, but I am not in the best frame of mind at the mo to make them or fix what needs fixing or anything like that...
So I'll pray to my God to at least allow me to see the wonderful trees through our blackened wood. And then we'll get moving. Possibly literally.
Blast.
Sainsbury's seemed like Heaven to me this morning. Cool, white and a haven for lost souls.
There were very few lady shoppers and only one or two gents. One guy paying particular attention to my dithering over Red Onions. As I prodded and tested the deep glossy red flesh of a small one to see if it was fit for purpose I smelled his heavy scent... "Was he useable?" I thought..."I bet he is" and then his gruff tones broke my onion revelry..."A net is better value".
Oh baby...
And so as I dropped my net into the small poor people's trolley I thought, if He, the man in the rugged blue shirt would give me his money I could give him his youth back.
Prid Pro Quo Grandad.
I smiled real slow... just enough to make him happy... and trollied off leaving him stiff by the new potatoes.
Coochy.
Then home in a storm.
And to a storm.
Blimey!
But I am a Soldier and one who is used to small conflicts
But this is a Filthy Lucre War and war is big and war is bloody and war is tiring and we might get a pasting but I've no doubt we'll finally smile.......even if it's a toothless one:)
Wednesday, 3 August 2011
My Name is Angela
(How refreshing to use my real name.)
And so as Seal flaps his vocals I'm flipping rapidly from sober to wtf.
So I penned my red leather diary to the max and then noticed the last entry was Jan this year. 'Lot happened in seven months' I thought as the breeze from the gaping window ate into my neck.
I was only worried then. But now I'm falling, fooling around like a lost kid in a concrete park at midnight without kneepads or hand to hold.
Scared but thrilled, cut but not quite bleeding to death,
Losses.
Of self-esteem, not in abundance at the best of times, yes the Great Glo skins herself.
Losing ideas, mostly creative. Losing momentum. Time was when I'd take reckless chances, having knickers for goalposts...Nowadays precautions with a capital P.
Losing people. Some by death, not their fault, some by being Angela. All her fault.
Now I must fly to the oven, Seal is telling me "Don't Cry"
Perfect timing:)
And so as Seal flaps his vocals I'm flipping rapidly from sober to wtf.
So I penned my red leather diary to the max and then noticed the last entry was Jan this year. 'Lot happened in seven months' I thought as the breeze from the gaping window ate into my neck.
I was only worried then. But now I'm falling, fooling around like a lost kid in a concrete park at midnight without kneepads or hand to hold.
Scared but thrilled, cut but not quite bleeding to death,
Losses.
Of self-esteem, not in abundance at the best of times, yes the Great Glo skins herself.
Losing ideas, mostly creative. Losing momentum. Time was when I'd take reckless chances, having knickers for goalposts...Nowadays precautions with a capital P.
Losing people. Some by death, not their fault, some by being Angela. All her fault.
Now I must fly to the oven, Seal is telling me "Don't Cry"
Perfect timing:)
Tuesday, 2 August 2011
Monday, 1 August 2011
Demons 1 Angels 2
Demons in abundance in the early hours this morning as you saw by my 4 a.m. post.
But now, with the fresh breeze of an early August day riding rough over my Chest Monuments (doing stuff in a slip of a summer dress by an open kitchen window does that) I'm approaching Monday with a new vicious love of life. Angels of a wised up womanly nature have taken me under their wings but not after a thorough talking to.
So No feeble attempts to strain the gravy nor any more attempts for perfection in any sphere of life.
Firstly I'll sink the clothes into the sink whooshing cheapo clothes around in cheapo suds then I'll bake another domeless Gingerbread (last week's one receiving Five Stars.)
Then Marinate Drumsticks in oil and lemon and garlic, then spread herb butter (chives, parsley and basil) into the gaping splits of a few small warm Pittas. Rice will be the plain and simple bed on which the chicken will sit, before being torn.
Other domesticalia for today....Tidying the garden again, don't know WHY the postage stamp gets so mucked up, after all, I'm rarely out there but mucked it gets so............
And when the sun is at its highest and the pigeons are snoozing after gulping, I'll pat Dad down under the Japanese Maple, the bush I love the most.
I'll probably say something, probably something innocuous like "There you go Matey".
Then a Wink;)
So m'dears I have to Drink Tea and Carry On:)
Gosh My Chest Monuments have lost their Badges. (Kinda warm in the office...)
But now, with the fresh breeze of an early August day riding rough over my Chest Monuments (doing stuff in a slip of a summer dress by an open kitchen window does that) I'm approaching Monday with a new vicious love of life. Angels of a wised up womanly nature have taken me under their wings but not after a thorough talking to.
So No feeble attempts to strain the gravy nor any more attempts for perfection in any sphere of life.
Firstly I'll sink the clothes into the sink whooshing cheapo clothes around in cheapo suds then I'll bake another domeless Gingerbread (last week's one receiving Five Stars.)
Then Marinate Drumsticks in oil and lemon and garlic, then spread herb butter (chives, parsley and basil) into the gaping splits of a few small warm Pittas. Rice will be the plain and simple bed on which the chicken will sit, before being torn.
Other domesticalia for today....Tidying the garden again, don't know WHY the postage stamp gets so mucked up, after all, I'm rarely out there but mucked it gets so............
And when the sun is at its highest and the pigeons are snoozing after gulping, I'll pat Dad down under the Japanese Maple, the bush I love the most.
I'll probably say something, probably something innocuous like "There you go Matey".
Then a Wink;)
So m'dears I have to Drink Tea and Carry On:)
Gosh My Chest Monuments have lost their Badges. (Kinda warm in the office...)
The pad I keep for times such as these has fallen. Fallen behind the table into the dust. It lays out of reach. So I've headed screenwards.
It's silent here.
Would the noise of a gently closed car door make an impact?
I feel like going to a green spot where nothing is but curled up fowl so I can listen more clearly to the distressing thoughts pingponging against my skull. Bangbang and bang again. No peace for the foolish. A short supplication.... they're gone? No.
So up naked and cool I sit considering the outside.
It's silent here.
Would the noise of a gently closed car door make an impact?
I feel like going to a green spot where nothing is but curled up fowl so I can listen more clearly to the distressing thoughts pingponging against my skull. Bangbang and bang again. No peace for the foolish. A short supplication.... they're gone? No.
So up naked and cool I sit considering the outside.
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