Recent pics. Lovely.

Gentle Glo...

Leek Soup. Baps. Rock Cakes. Lemon and Poppyseed Traybake. And My Phone.
All homemade. Except the phone.

A dinky bag for a dinky birthday mum.

Fruity Salad. Pittas. Yoghurt and Tahini Sauce. Felafel. Mango Chutney. So Yum.

Ideas for poems...
Porridge sweetened by teardrops
The Eternal planner


Being cooked today:
Beef Cobbler
Lemon pudding and custard
Hazelnut Buns

Being pondered this afternoon:
Changes.

:)

I'm A Twit With An Artistic Streak

Let me tell you why.

Most people with bulbous knees would refrain from hauling furniture from one dusty spot to the other but not me. Yesterday, with joints aflame, I dragged a badly painted bookcase from the hall into the kitchen and all on account of a seagull clock.

The wonderful charity shop find (CLOCK) was very at home on the windowsill but something wasn't quite right. Something about its stark in yer face position rubbed me the very wrong way so, with artistic hat on I dreamt up something new.

I know I thought, I'll put it by the chipped pillar, only thing was I hadn't a thing on which to mount it. That's the clock not the pillar.
After limping around the kitchen looking thisaway and thataway I came up with the brilliant idea of
the hall bookcase.

I love it when my mental lights come on and all manner of crazy ideas inhabit my head and, without a thought about knees, the bookcase was soon in place.
But at a price.

Right in the corner by the 'window with no purpose' and the 'pillar which holds up the ceiling' is Monty's Armchair and he was sprawled upon it like a miserable old man shagged out by downing too much wallop, but I needed to shove the chair a little to the right to get the bookcase in.....Monty's head spun and his likkle eyes took on a bemused what you doing this to me for look. I did it anyway.
Bitch Mum.

And there, after knocking it into position with my hips, stood the empty old bookcase. But it wasn't empty for long.

On it's three shelves were placed all my recipe books, well maybe not ALL, but a good majority, if I were to place ALL my tattered food books on it, there'd have been no room for the SEAGULL CLOCK.
And it does look cute and sweet and ever so slightly Nordic especially as I've also arranged some blue and white objects amongst the books. Blue and white jugs and vases and a broken blue flowered teacup, this teacup is handleless but so in love with it am I that I won't chuck it. Even when something one loves is of no use any more one would need to be a monster to abandon it.
By the way John did his bit by staying in the front parlour...

Today no such extreme physical activities will occur unless one calls making a tray of Tiffin physical activity.
An Everest of ironing will be looked at likewise a Snowdonia of felled branches. But I am not Superwoman and neither is John except maybe when he takes an interest in my lipstick, so today's agenda is of a more cerebral kind. A little gentle home cooking followed by the reading of my comments.


Ta ta!

Glo's Cafe Is Open

Being served tonight...

Sweet and Sour Chicken with Peppers, Mushrooms and Carrots
Pancake Rolls with Spicy Sauce
Angie's Special Fried Rice.

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Apple Cake
Vanilla Ice Cream

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Lager Beer
Lemonade


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Proper cutlery not allowed
It's chopsticks or nothing.

Patrons wearing red clothes with dragons on will be well looked after.
Oiks in jeans will be seated by the lavatories.
People caught lifting my teaspoons will be cleavered.

Enjoy your meal...

On the table tonight:
Nasi Goreng. Cat.

This favourite of mine will be served in one of my favourite bowls, bought of course, in a charity shop. And will be eaten quietly with a glass of water and on-table feline. Yes, Monty has his own place at the table, with his very own mat, paper napkin and vibrant green plate
His vicious furry salivating mouth will chew for seconds on delicate rice and tender veg and then his perfect paw will persuade me to shove more in his direction. And I will of course obey.

He will not have pud because blackcurrants are for fools...Although if I splatter some double cream his way he might decide to join me.
Cats are great aren't they?

Did a stint at Henry's today and and as I slightly scorched a lilac shirt I dreamt about the weekend. Curry, clothes and lemonade and suddenly the smell of burnning polyester didn't seem so bad.

Scorched Stuff

I made some strange cakes yesterday. They were a cross between a muffin and a doughnut, so I've decided to call them Muffnuts:)

My consuming passion is er....consuming! And as a result have spent far too much time in the kitchen creating all sorts of weird stuff. I suppose cooking IS creative although I don't always see it that way especially when things stick on the bottom of saucepans like my onion sauce did yesterday. I'd sweated the wretched onions for ages, then added stock, tomato ketchup, oregano, Worcestershire sauce and other stuff. Then I made a mistake....I popped into the office....Oh dear.

As you all know one can get carried away on line and so when I finally remembered the sauce I shot up from my chair only to find a rapidly reduced sauce and Monty looking posh on the back of his chair. It's at times like this, when I think a hound might come in useful. This hound would have been trained to alert me when cakes, buns and sauces start to turn black. But that's just phooey because I would rather have a scorched sausage and a pussy than a perfect pie and a poochie.

Nonsensical Stuff now:
If I changed my name I'd change it to Josephine Wack,
I cuddled a cat yesterday and it wasn't Monty.
Pigeons are so predictable. But lovable.
Girls who giggle need a slap. Giggling is annoying to oldies because it reminds them of their youth.
Monkeys are dangerous when aroused. All their pornography should be shredded.
Old people should be restrained especially in August. They do so clog up the parks.
Men under fifty should have my address.
Men over fifty shouldn't.
That's enough nonsense for today. Possibly more tomorrow.

On the menu today: Perfect Chicken in a Perfect Sauce....

Panless Day

I don't have a pan for my pancakes...

I've got several frying pans but not one of them is small enough to hold the perfect pancake. So....I WON'T MAKE ANY!
But I will.
Probably at the weekend. Because by then I will have bought a six or seven inch pan.
Doesn't seem right somehow, it's Shrove Tuesday and I'm on my own. Well Monty is here of course but he doesn't give a flying fig about batter type things. Just as long as he can smear Nautical Fish all over his whiskers, he'll be fine.

When I return from a short shopping trip I'll be baking some miniature Bakewell Tarts, otherwise known as 3 inch Bakewell Maids. Something rather gooey and fairytaleish about dinky pastries. All I need now is my Prince. But that's soppy girls stuff and I'm a serious woman. Mostly.

Small General Thoughts:

Watched yet another Morgan Freeman film last night. 'Along Came A Spider'. I was in bed again but without the fish. This time the only scales in sight were right by the long mirror. They're not used much, because I scare easily...

The Lamb Couscous was fabulous. Tender chops braised in a coriander, ginger and cumin sauce. I over did it on the apricots though, they looked like oranges spaceships floating in a spicy universe. Tasted good though. The couscous was buttery and plentiful.

Silly people have complained to the BBC about children's presenter, Cerri Burnell. Cerri has one arm and irate over-sensitive mums and dads have said she 'scares' their kids. What a load of rubbish.

I've gone right off Minced Beef.

I think my ears are getting longer.

Battered Down South

The storms last night were horrendous and many parts of Essex are flooded. As I look out of my office window I see the remnants of devilish winds and torrential rain, the bushes are still swaying and the dividing fence between me and my neighbour is rattling. But a hardy old soul has just passed by, his red and white anorak puffed up like a tent and I wonder where he's going. Probably down to Somerfields or the bakers.
And me, where am I going? Nowhere.

On the menu today Chicken casserole, mashed potatoes and green beans. For pud? Chocolate pudding and custard.

The chicken casserole is a queer old thing because it's made with store cupboard ingredients. Two chicken legs are browned with some onions and then a handful of lemon, thyme and parsley stuffing, some cooking wine and a tin of tomatoes are added. Plenty of black pepper and a kiss of salt are added too. Simple stuff but much welcomed on a winter's day.

Mashed potatoes are a subject worth talking about. I always pop in a good amount of butter and some warm milk and then beat it up with a big old fork.
The chocolate pudding I'll be making will have traditional pudding makers spitting feathers because I'll be making a microwaveable version. Shock horror! Don't get me wrong, it's still a fabulous little pudding, only it won't take three hours to cook; more like three minutes...
The recipe, funnily enough, comes from The Farmhouse Kitchen Microwave Cookbook. I wonder what Dorothy Sleightholme would think. Bless her.
Anyway that's enough of domestic stuff.

I'm in the mood for love so I expect a daft poem or two might be posted.

Great Green Grapes

I usually take cakes to Mum and Dad, but tomorrow I'm taking a Grape Infested Lime Jelly.

Banana

1. Marinate beef in cider for tonight's Scrumpy Beef Casserole. Will not take a sip of the cider though because I never ever drink before I've had me porridge.

2.. Put banana in pocket then go to pet shop for bird seed and fat balls. On coming out of the pet shop resist the urge to cross the road and walk around the playing field. Too many elderly anoraked peole with small incontinent dogs.

3. Carry on walking way down to the charity shop in Marsten Gardens where I'll no doubt be greeted by orange meringued hair Joan. She has a beige caravan and big heart. Eat banana.

4. Then into Somerfield on account of me forgetting breakfast cereals yesterday. Will huff and sigh and blink rapidly as I look at the over priced Bran Flakes. 'Outrageous' I'll mumble on my way to the till cruelly ignoring the Phil the manager's, Friday special offer.

5. Go the long way home so I can say later on today that I've had some exercise in a side street.

6. Home. For legs up and sausage sandwich.

7. Check emails, online food (have my own BBC recipe folder), and look for a very short scary story by Edgar Alan Poe. I had it once now I can't find it. Sounds familiar.

8. Tea and tea bread. Possibly a banana.

9. Marinate chicken, bananas and peppers in orange juice, lemon juice and curry paste. I love to soak things.

10. The Weakest Link with my idol Ms Anne Robinson who's double entendres are nearly as good as mine.

Liver and Baggy Eyes

Oh am I tired?
Couldn't sleep last night, wasn't the steak and chips I had at 6, it was the after effects of spending the day with two sick people. The doctor said Mum has diabetes and dad was spinning out of control with anxiety. There's no talking to him. He's deaf in many ways. Mum winced as yet more blood was taken, and my hat fell off as I helped her onto the scales.
Yesterday was horrid.

I need to try and concentrate on my poetry but I can't hold a single thought or idea in my head. Sounds like I need a break. Maybe a trip to Hockley might do the trick.

But before that I'll zip along to blessed Sainsburys with the radio on, then very very slowly I'll trawl my way around the great shop. I might even have a chat with the butcher. Mostly about liver.

General thoughts before dinner

On the menu tonight:
Toad-in-the-Hole, made not with regular sausages but with posh spicy pork sausages and apple.
Jacket potatoes
Beans
For pud the last of yesterdays Trifle.

I have an idea for a short story which may or may not come to fruition. All depends on whether or not I can concentrate. My concentration is all over the place at the moment what with one thing and another but I'm sure I'll come out from this dark hiding place waving my pen and beads around.
Mr Horsehound had to take the car in today for an M.O.T or something and it seems we need new wheels. Real proper wheels that is, not a new car!

I'm looking forward to watching as Barack Obama makes history tomorrow, I never thought I'd see a black man as President, the more I think about it the more incredible it is. I wonder what he and Michelle will do tonight. Will they sit quietly by their fireside pondering the almighty changes which are about to take place or will they drink coffee and play with their children.
A little of both I expect.

Idol Sunday

On my agenda for today is watching hours and hours of American Idol. Also on the agenda is the demolishing of a large roasted chicken, won't and can't eat all of it of course because I want some left over for tomorrow. The stuffing accompaniment is good old sage and onion which always goes down well with a calamity of glazed and tinged carrots. Potatoes yes of course, big and brown but not cooked alongside the bird on account of the bird emanating juices and making the aforementioned potatoes go soggy. No the potatoes get a roasting on their own.

For pud, a mandarin trifle in which I've thrown a few sliced green grapes to sassify it, I've gone overboard with the roasted (there's that word again) almonds, nothing looks better than a layer of browned nuts on top of some nice thick cream.
For tea we'll have a chicken sandwich, it'll be an earlyish tea because we've got an earlyish start tomorrow and I don't want to be kept awake by an undigested bird in me stomach.

Like I said earlier I'm watching lots of American Idol later today not only because I love talent shows but because I truly admire Simon Cowell's trousers.

The picture is of me up a ladder some time ago, I was not drunk, just happy. Further pictures of me will be posted on account of my fascination with cameras.

Secondhand Queenie and The Heavenly Bangers

I see that rail fares are going up again and that is something I really don't need to hear this morning. So to off set the gloom of a miserable January morning I will hide away in the kitchen. Nothing new there then.

Yesterday I made something spectacular.
I baked some Toulouse sausages (baking sausages is much better than frying or grilling, but you must use good quality bangers.) To serve with the sausages I made Sweet Potatoes with a Lime, Chilli and Garlic butter. Fab! Some sweetcorn and a spoonful or three of Red Pepper chutney completed the dinner from heaven. Ooops I nearly forget the almost best bit...Pudding.
For pud I made plenty of Sticky Toffee Cakes.....So after a bowl of Nasi Goreng today I'll get stuck in to more sticky cakes. I may not even use a cake fork.

The picture up there was taken on New Years Eve, everything I'm wearing is secondhand except what you can't see!
And on that outrageous note I'll sign orf.

Toes, TMJ and Beef Pie

Went for a brisk walk this morning. Wanted to feel my heart pounding just to remind myself I'm still alive. I walked all along the Ashingdon Road up to the Post Office, where I spoke to two elderly ladies about multi-tasking and Christmas. Then into the Pet shop next door, where a disabled Lassie dog was having his back wheels seen to.
Then after gazing across a field I limped down to the charity shop in Manstead Gardens. I say limped because my toes and jaw are hurting. Anyway in there I bough a pale blue and white spotted butter dish, petrol blue salt and pepper pots. I won't use them, they're just for decoration. I will use the butter dish though because it's a stunner.
Came out and stood on the corner thinking whether or not to go into the bleakest shop in Essex, Somerfield. I decided against it. Too depressing.

I think I know why my joints are aching it's because on Saturday I went to an X Factor party in Southend. I didn't dance but I did talk a lot and wore toe pinching shoes. I have had jaw trouble for a few years, Temporo Mandibular Joint Dysfunction it's called, and it plays up when I've yakked excessively. My toes are just plain annoying, they're arthritic and made worse by idiotic shoes. Anyway, after eating my way through lots of good food, (the lemony olives being a particular favourite) I sat in the car at 2 in the morning vowing to myself, my husband and God that I'll never have another Port. Until Christmas day.

On the menu today: Beef and Beer Pie, a newly discovered recipe. I'll have it with a couple of potatoes and the rest of Sundays cabbage. For pud, something very simple, a Queen of Puddings I expect. Very light and so ideal after a pie.
Now I have to get going on account of not having made the pastry for the pie yet, and I do like it to rest before I roll it.

What Glo Did, What Glo Will Do...

Went out this morning looking like a bag-lady.

I bought a blonde fairy for the tree 20p
Two lengths of plastic bell festooned rope in red and silver 40p
A 'Tiffany' style candle holder in shades of blue and green £1:50

Put Christmas cards through the letterboxes of four neighbours.
Looked at row upon row of chocolate bars in the sweet shop as I queued to pay for a padded envelope. 39p
Might make a Minestrone soup for tomorrow because I bought some bacon and a reduced-in-price cabbage today. Although I'm toying with the idea of making Stuffed Cabbage leaves in a sexy Tomato sauce.
Spoke to the postman who happens to look like a Viking.

Now I must create but not with a keyboard or paints but with a mixing bowl and chopper.

Sweet

I'm in the mood for a pudding.
Any pudding.
Sweet or savoury I don't mind. I just need to see a fat wobbling thing on my plate.

Talking of fat wobbling things. Monty isn't behaving in a cat-like fashion because the tree is STILL erect. Not a bauble or shattered light is on the floor. No sir, he's being very very good...
Talking of being very very good, I've done my Mrs Mop act for the day and am well pleased to be back amongst my own mess and dust as opposed to suffocating in my employer's mess and dust. Although it's hardish work it does have its benefits, one such benefit being that it gives my cardio-vascular system a good old work out. Positively glowing I am, with ruddy cheeks and a damp back, why I almost feel fit!
Although I do have an annoying ache about six inches under my right shoulder blade...That's that flipping Henry again!

Anyway I'm home now and in a tick I'll be in the bosom of my home, the kitchen, making yet another cake, no, I tell a lie, I'll be making two cakes. One for my husband's lunch boxes, the other for me to gnaw on during my long winter afternoons. If that wasn't enough to be getting on with, I've got to start thinking about Mincemeat cakes. And Mincemeat cakes are just a simpler version of the traditional Christmas cake, they don't need 'feeding' with brandy and all that sort of nonsense, they taste delicious eaten totally alcohol free and straight away, which is always nice. They contain not only a jar of best Mincemeat but other goodies as well, goodies like extra raisins and a few chopped dried apricots. So I'm not a complete Scroogey AND I lay whole almonds on top, so that's another excellent addition. All in all my Mincemeat cakes are jolly good. I have about three to make, no four, one for us, another for mum and dad and the other two for a couple of chums. I only wish I could send one to the States, but it'd be off and a bit green by the time it arrived. Never mind.

I am determined not to get in a flap this year, because I always do you know. Always. The tree is up, the cards are bought (not sent) the menus for Christmas Eve, Day and Boxing day are in my mind (just) and the Christmas Day message to my readers is in WordPad. So everything is tickety boo.
Now into the kitchen to make an Apple cake, a Raisin Tea Bread and.....A SYRUP PUDDING!!!
The picture is of an old Raisin Tea Bread. Made in the summer probably.

Urgent

On my to-do list:

Find Tree Feet
Radio 4
Sausage and onion sandwich
General mismanagement of house
Tree Feet Finding
Tinned Tomato Soup with cooked potatoes dropped in whilst watching The Weakest Link
Making a large sweet thing for Saturday
More bad housekeeping but done with tinsel in my heart
Tree Feet...?

Just had a plate of spaghetti bolognaise.
Didn't have garlic bread with it because I've run out of butter and making garlic butter with margarine is an awful thing to do. So no garlic bread. But I did have a naughty treat afterwards, had a pain au chocolate with a cup of tea. Oh yes...

Went to my favourite charity shop today in Manstead Gardens, bought a few good bits and pieces:
2 tall glass storage jars with red flowers imprinted on them. Very Christmassy I felt.
A box of 18 gold straw Christmas tree decorations. More Christmassey even.
A fake diamond brooch with two stones missing, it's a bit battered, Mum will like that.
A faded black t shirt with some fancy embroidery round the neck, could look ok tarted up with glitzy jewellery.
A box of stationery called 'I Love You'. 10 envelopes but only 8 sheets of paper. Obviously someone has told of their love so now doesn't need any more paper.
2 silver coloured candlesticks with a mosaic effect all over. They are now on my mantelpiece with a tall white candles stuck in the spikey thing. Hope Monty doesn't take a liking to them.

Came home via Brays Lane because I wanted to enjoy the peace and quiet. Home to the compiling of a shopping list, the making of a cake, the cleaning of kitchen window. Then it rained.
Tonight I'm expecting company so I'd better clean me teeth and get the cake on a doiley.

Old Fashioned In Every Way

The good thing about the year drawing to an end is the food I cook to ward off the blues of the golden season!
I've been on one of my favourite sites 'Retro Food Recipes' (see my list of favourite sites below somewhere) and it's made me want to do all things creatively culinary!
I know Chicken Kiev is naff, likewise Beef Strogonoff and Lancashire Hot Pot but these dishes are so perfect in every way that I must make them immediately. I've made Chicken Kiev many times of course and it never fails to please, especially when the first puddle of hot garlic butter oozes out. I'm getting quite excited.

Reading 'Retro Food Recipes' has certainly got my juices flowing but it's not only the grub, it's finding out that my beloved Mary Berry wrote a book in 1977 called 'Day by Day Cooking'. I'm in a flap over this because I thought I knew all the books Mrs Berry had written. I've got some of them but this one is new to me. Gotta get it.

Some time soon I'll post a list of my favourite recipe books, it'll be a hotch potch list because I'm a hotch potch kind of cook.

Got womanly things to do today.
These womanly things consisting of:
Deciding which skirt to wear. Running the car engine for five minutes because I don't want to stall at the mini-roundabout again. Talking to pigeons. Packing a banana in my handbag in case I go a bit funny on the train.