If Only

mother used her tongue on others as she uses it on me.
She ripped into me at 7 45 I mean she really gave me both barrels . In a word she loathes me. She has too. The ridiculous sentiments that were flung my way could only come from a woman who despises her daughter.
Apparently I only get up early because my mate rob comes round after work.
Er....I'm up early EVERY DAY mother dearest. You know changing your underwear and washing you.
These small things so easily forgotten.

And then the killer blow.
She told me to get proper carers in.
Hmmm I thought. If it's soooo bad here why not book yourself into a hospice like the doctor suggested.

I  yelled. My heart in tatters. My mind completely at a loss as to what to do now.
In the heat of the moment I reminded her of something she said to me a few years ago..
"I wish you'd never been born"

She conveniently forgot she ever said it.
But she clearly remembers something dad said to her as he lay in his hospital bed
 "You've ruined my life"

He is the only person she ever took notice of despite the verbal cruelty. Me? I'm the afterbirth. Yuk.