After yesterday's domestic kerfuffles I feel like letting my hair down a little, and I would if I had any!
As young Lisa (38) snipped my hair yesterday she talked non-stop about her recent jaunt to Spain, her horrible step-mum, her two long haired cats and one golden dog, the price of salmon, petrol, bread and Debenhams handbags.
And as she ran her ring bedecked fingers through my hair I thought how nice this all was. Here I was sitting on a wonky kitchen chair being shorn like Shaun the Sheep by a woman who looked like a younger version of Maggie Thatcher and I was quite enjoying it. Lisa is a decent enough sort but like I said yesterday she's got some chav DNA going on, her pink top, white trousers and bucketloads of gold jewellry all married up in a sickly bag-of-sweets kind of way. She stopped occasionally asking me how I wanted my sideburns and fringe and did I want a ducks arse at the back! I answered her by saying in order of asking; Feathered, just a bit off and yes please!.
But being a business woman she was dead keen on earning more money so she suggested that I might look even more lovely with blonde streaks. Er...no thanks Leese I choked, I like being grey. She was not amused, in fact I got the impression she thought I was a bit odd for liking grey hair. But I brushed her narrow mindedness to one side and continued blowing bits of chopped hair off my top lip.
She cut away till I told her to cut no more and after handing over loads of cash, Lisa waddled back to Great Wakering, and I skipped into the bedroom and hugged Monty.

On the Horsehound To Do list today:

Spaghetti Bolognaise, it's still a corker even if it's a bit naff
Making chocolate Fairy Cakes, because sultanas are getting on my nerves
Radio Four fest, a sanctuary for the delicate
Tidying up of office, I can't put it off any longer
Continue reading 'The Great Fire of London' by Peter Ackroyd. I'm on my knees to this man.
Looking in various mirrors and smiling at my new haircut because I think I look like a sophisticated French bird when really I look like an Essex convict.