Our dinner was warm and tender. Succulent meat, soothing veggies and a sweet and gooey rice pud.
And by jolly jingo I needed something warm inside me after the latest lambasting from Mother.
How the woman hurt me.

But I suppose when one's life is ebbing away one loses all sense of decorum and loveliness. She hurt me one hell of a lot.
So I took my leave and spent time on the phone and in another place.

Time heals.
I know that because when I took her tray in a little while ago she tapped my forehead asking if I was alright.
I of course told a porkie.
How could I possibly sit on her bed saying how much she'd burnt my silly soul by saying I was "so greedy".
This in reference to the Attendance Allowance forms which arrived today whilst I was wheeling her around Southend Hospital.
I hadn't asked for them, they were delivered on the advice of the McMillan nurse.
But through mum's eyes I was being greedy for money.
I swore at her and those swear words clumped and thumped around and in my throat that by the time I'd squelched around in the dull and silent garden I thought I'd drop dead by the clematis so overwrought and brittle I'd become.
I didn't die by the way, this is no ghost bashing out these words, it's me Gloria, all sweet flesh and rose red blood.
And at any rate I have people and a life and things to look forward to. Sticks and Stones.....

I'm out and about tomorrow come thunder or heatwave.
Come vitriolic attack or motherly kiss...

Goodnight All.