Just a Sandwich

Just had a smashed sardine.
Monty came in.
Laid it on top of one scrunched up Iceberg lettuce leaf (expensive I know but I'm working now so...) then placed it upon a slice of Warburton's finest, then topped it with thinly sliced tomato. Then covered it with another slice of utterly buttery buppy.
Monty was interested.
I ate this with a cup of sweet black tea, then to add a bit of glamour, I finished the good girl's snack with a low fat raspberry yogurt.
Monty left me.

Now this sudden dive into the thrilling choppy seas of healthy eating is on account of my small intestines. They've been playing up. I refuse to go into detail but if you've ever seen a football, well that was my belly all this week:( I could have could laid face down upon the floor going boing boing and not got one bit of dust upon my busty chesty. That's how far off the ground I was!.
Anyway after Googling tummys I found out loads of grim stuff about intestines and what happens therein if you're not careful.
And that is why I ate a sardine.
OK?